Dear Dotty,

I've had extremely rotten luck when it comes to dates. I have great friends who happen to think that I need a boyfriend. Hey, I'm not complaining if that happened, but they seem to personally take it upon themselves to find me "that guy". So my great friends set me up on countless numbers of not so great blind dates. This last one was no exception. I told myself that if it was awful that I would never again go on a blind date. That being said, I did go in with the best attitude I could muster up. It was in vain. He was so pushy. He cracked a number of "women" driver jokes, talked about his love of working out (sometimes two times a day...oh boy!), and we can't forget his love of Pokemon. Yes, you read that right. That creepy Asian inspired cult thing. He dedicates hours and hours to the "sport" and is in intensive training. Oh and we can't forget the fact that apparently he was embarrassed being around ME. For what exactly, I'm not sure. Needless to say... it was awful. I'm left wondering if I should just swear off all help from my friends or keep at it? I don't know if swearing off all blind dates is too drastic or not. Could it be that one day I do meet someone through a blind date and it doesn't make me hate my life?

The Blind Dater

Hmmm... so either your friends don't know you at all or secretly they are out to sabotage your happiness and well-being. This guys sounds like a complete goon. He sleeps with a Jiggly Puff night light (don't ask me how I know the name of an actual Pokemon, let's just say... I have a past) and YOU embarrass him. Wow. First off, everyone knows that Pokemon is for the Chess Club rejects. He has probably been harboring some deep bitterness in his heart for years now and being a complete weirdo is his outlet. Let me guess, he also lives in his parents basement with a pet gerbil named Frances and he has every edition of the Spiderman comics. I think we need to take into account that 96% of blind dates all end up being the worst experience of a daters' life. Don't challenge where I got that statistic because I made it up. But I'm pretty sure if you wanted a legit percent it would be pretty close if not higher than the one I gave. Seriously, the worst day of my life was a blind date. Let's just say it involved a Dungeons and Dragons party, me dressed up as a dragon and being "stabbed" with an impromptu sword made from a metal hanger. Yep. I don't know what was worse. Enduring the 5 hours of dress up and medieval nonsense or the idea that one of my closest friends thought we would "just be two peas in a pod". Oh barf. We will tackle my woes later though. As for you, I don't think you should give up completely. Just pick better friends. Okay, I'm not serious. I do think you should shun them for at least a month for this though. I think the best thing I can say right now is to not spend all of your time waiting. Sometimes we get something we want when we are not really thinking about it. Now, don't become some loser freak who spends all her time watching reruns of Hannah Montana (been there) and eating all the cookie dough before you can make the cookies (done that). Go on. Have fun, be busy and be fan-friggen-tastic. If another opportunity for a blind date comes along, then take it. Maybe you could meet him that way. Or maybe you bump into him at the grocery store, the library or even the dump. You just never know. Keep on keepin' on.

Dotty

P.S. I'm curious as to what "intensive training" for Pokemon is. Does it involve playing all the kids at the local elementary school during recess? On weekends does he spend his precious time studying by watching reruns of Pokemon on PBS? Oh sigh... nothing makes me swoon more than seeing Pikachu take down his opponent. Don't worry, I totally looked up "Pokemon characters" on google to try and find names. It not only made me ashamed, but confused. Don't judge me.